Weaponized Honesty

Truth and honesty are essential in healthy teams and organizations.

They are the basis for developing trust, that essential ingredient in any relationship (professional or personal) which allows for connection, creativity, growth, innovation, collaboration, and more.

But honesty can also be weaponized. And speaking the truth can be an act of control rather than an invitation to freedom.

Phrases like “just telling it like it is” or “brutal honesty” or “just speaking the truth” are telltale signs of weaponized honesty. And using honesty as a weapon is never healthy. Over time, it has the potential to foster a complete breakdown in trust and hope.

Great leaders don’t lower standards, abandon values, or make excuses for their people. Instead they do everything in their power to point people to the honest truth while also supporting, encouraging, investing in, and developing people. This isn’t being soft or weak. It’s being present, being empathetic, and being human.

You can be direct and forthcoming while at the same time help a person figure out what they need to do in order to see clearly, create a plan, and move forward. You can’t and shouldn’t do the work for them, but as a leader, it’s your responsibility to actively give them everything they need to win.

If you are always and only brutally honest, why would anyone choose to stick around for that? Why would anyone stay if you bludgeon and belittle people with “honesty”?

It’s a leader’s responsibility to help their people grow and succeed. When you use honesty as a tool to break people, you are failing to lead. If you weaponize truth, how can anyone ever admit when they need help, made a mistake, or don’t know how to change? Trust is essential and weaponized honesty is a sure way to eliminate trust from every corner of your team. You can do better. Your people need you to do better.

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