What Matters Most Is How You Walk Through the Fire

You can beat death in life

Last year our beloved cat Skye enjoyed a spoonful of cream, sauntered into my son’s room, and dropped dead.

He was only a year old Maine Coon, but apparently, the breed is prone to underlying heart conditions. My wife and I scooped up his limp body and sped to the veterinarian’s office, but there was nothing they could do.

We tearfully held his paws on the exam table, said our goodbyes, and drove home in stunned silence.

The next morning I accompanied my wife to a doctor’s appointment to get the results of some tests. Her doctor sat down in front of us and said, “You have breast cancer.”

Those four words launched my wife and me into the fire. The fire of fear, uncertainty, tests, surgeries, and stress.

On the day of my wife’s double mastectomy, I took a cell phone picture of her just before surgery. We wanted to share a photo with family.

My wife held up her right hand and gave a thumbs up.

She was moments away from the fire. The fire of surgery, uncertainty, pain, and fear. Yet she gave a thumbs up for the photo, to tell her family that it will all be okay.

That’s how you walk through the fire.

With dignity and grace.

Bukowski suffered from terrible acne as a youth, thus isolating him from others his age. The suffering in the Depression deepened his rage, all of which fueled his writing and worldview.

Bukowski’s writing can be blunt and depressing, often transcending our preciousness and treacly optimism. Yet it also finds…

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